Being able to give advise to others, help others, but being unable to help yourself. Much like a doctor telling his patients to not smoke but he himself smokes. A hypocrite if you will.
I've always wanted to help others, but I'm unable to pull myself out of the quicksand that I myself have stepped in.I remember how you told me once that I have to help myself before I can help others. How true indeed and yes, the memories are still latched on. I have a knack for remembering the good stuff... and the bad stuff.
If you were to ask me face to face if I have forgiven myself of the hurt I inflicted to a certain group of young teens a LONG LONG time ago, I can safely say that I have forgiven myself. But I doubt myself, I keep thinking that instead of forgiving, I have buried the feelings under a carpet. And this carpet is the happy me, smiling me, laughing me. I choose to believe that I have forgiven.
After all, it's our choices that determine who we are, not our abilities.
And was it directed to me, what you wrote?
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